Lindsay

25 years ago today I met Lindsay in person for the first time. In my last journal entry, I had mentioned there are those in our lives that leave fingerprints on our hearts. I didn't mentioned Lindsay because I knew I would be writing about her today. 25 years ago, I was running an online prayer chain and her uncle found my ministry through a search on a now defunct search engine...hehehe He asked for prayer for his niece who had been battling and was then dying from cancer. Her battle had lasted a few years at that point and he was looking to anyone who would pray for healing. Their story touched the hearts of the hundreds of prayer warriors on my team at the time.

After a few months of praying, I felt called to go see her and pray directly in person. There isn't any extra power in being in direct contact with someone when praying. But there is an added sense of hope sometimes. And for Lindsay and her family, it was an encouragement that someone from more than 500 miles away would want to travel just to pray with them.

Her and her family were the first people I ever met in person that I original came to know online. And this was well before social media became the thing it is today. They will always hold the title of first. But that isn't what put Lindsay's fingerprints on my heart. It was the love and dedication she had for the children she had met through her cancer journey that made an impact on me. Hearing her stories and seeing the pictures were such a Blessing. Also, for her Make-A-Wish wish, she asked for her bedroom to be remodeled. Instead of some fancy trip to a place like Disney World, she wanted something she could spend her last days comfortably enjoying and could pass along to her parents after she was gone.

Back then, we didn't have GPS on our phones. Cell phones in general weren't common, actually. As such, I didn't have a phone on me for this journey and all I had were basic directions written on paper to get there. I ended up being about an hour late because I got slightly lost along the way. I had to stop and ask someone from help with my directions...hehehe We don't have that problem anymore with maps on our phones. Times sure have changed! We had a good laugh when I finally did arrive.

The visit was quite lovely and the prayer time was very inspirational. We all went to a local amish restaurant for an amazing meal and we were in fellowship until about sunset. It was one of those days that I can bring up in my mind as if it was happening right in front of me. Like an old film playing on a popup screen in my living room as projected from 8mm film reels.

We did not witness a healing miracle in as far as her cancer being removed. Because her cancer not only remained, things took a turn for the worse shortly after my visit. About 2 weeks later, I found myself making a second trip back to see her. This trip was a bit sobering because we all realized that physical healing was not going to happen. And there were a lot of questions about what all of this could mean. No one's faith was shattered by not being healing through prayer on this day 25 years ago. But hope seemed all but lost at this point.

I almost cherish my second visit more so than that first one. All of the excitement had leveled off and we were more like long lasting friends. Our conversations were more natural and we got to know more about each other. We became very close on that visit. I even stayed the night in their home that weekend. After a few days, I went home.

A few weeks after that second visit, and in the middle of the night, she lifted her arm up and said, "I'm ready...". And then she breathed her last breath. Her parents were with her in that moment and were able to say their goodbyes. She was 20 when she passed. I think it was about a week later when they held her funeral; which I attended. Although it was sad, it was also a celebration of life.

I think it was about 5 years later, I went back to visit with the family and visit Lindsay's grave. I haven't been back since. I considered making a trip up to visit her grave today. I decided not to because I have since adopted the philosophy that this life is temporary and the Kingdom of God is forever. So when she and other loved ones pass, it isn't truly goodbye. It is more like, see you real soon. The only people I'm truly sad about now are when I don't know if they've given their lives to Christ or not. If I know they were a Christ follower, I believe I'll see them again. Or at least I know they'll be with Jesus in His Kingdom the same as I will be. There is no more sorrow and no more pain there, right!? Having a Kingdom focus helps me focus on Jesus and not so much on the pain of missing someone. Perhaps that's one of the many reasons He told us to seek His Kingdom first?..hehehe

I don't truly know what to expect when we get to Heaven. I'm not sure our minds can comprehend the vastness of God's Glory. I hope life in His Kingdom means we'll recognize those we knew here on earth. But I'm not sure that really matters as much as the fact that we will be with Jesus. If I do recognize Lindsay and she recognizes me, I'll be giving her one of the warmest hugs I possible can. I've had 25 years of practice giving warm hugs since I gave her that first warm hug of hers. I do not know how many more years of practice I'll have until I reach the Kingdom. Regardless, her fingerprints remain on my heart and each warm hug I give is a chance to pass that along.